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Lies all lies

Close to 2 months of inactivity. Whoops. I have been distracted by wedding planning, family and uni – countdown to graduation begins. Wedding planning has gone so well, that there is very little to do now except get bridesmaid dresses and the groomsmen sorted out. Yep I am that crazy organised (my mother likes to call it anal retentive).

I have my dress which I will be picking up sometime this week and I have to say as a whole I did not enjoy the whole wedding dress experience. I was contacted about 2 weeks ago to be told that my dress had arrived, I should have been excited, but with uni work piling up and assignments due – and the wedding 6 months away, I was just like “meh”. When I went to my second fitting, I was told that I would cry. Seriously? Over a garment? Now I cry when I watch a particularly moving elimination episode of Masterchef, but I blame that on the music and the cheesy lines. I was sceptical that I would cry when I tried on my wedding dress for the second time. I didn’t. The women at the bridal shop seemed confused by me, they ran to get a box of tissues and waved it around. Nada. Instead I just wanted to try on my shoes to see if they were too high for my dress length.

For me I think the tears will come on the day of the wedding, when I am in my dress with all my bridesmaids and my mum, and when I am walking down the aisle to Mr Apple, but not when I try on the dress because that is such a small part of the whole wedding and what it is actually about, and when I do cry I am sure there will be photos.

On a ligher note, I am obsessed with salted caramel at the moment, I think I will try make salted caramel cupcakes this weekend.

Blog to follow x

and I apologise for that, uni and life just got on top of me a wee bit. Hand in my last essay tomorrow, have an exam on Tuesday and then I am off travelling on Sunday. I will try and be a bit more regular with my posting from now on 🙂

 

Wedding things

I have finally got all my save the date cards sent out! It makes my wedding so much more real. I’ve also booked and confirmed my florist, hair and makeup people, celebrant and a very lovely wedding  planner (who also happens to be the wife of our photographer) who is going to help decorate our reception venue.

Save the Date Cards

Now to get back to uni life and study for a test next week. The wedding planning is (sometimes) a nice break.

Fashion baby

A few weeks ago I was lucky enough to get to attend iD Fashion Week here in Dunedin. I went to the emerging designers awards with Ms Organised and the main fashion show with Mr Apple. Some of the stuff was incredible and very very expensive ($2000 for a leather jacket anyone?). One of the the pieces that caught my eye was a sweater by Ruby. Remember my favourite dinosaur post? Guess what?

Ruby triceratops sweater

I want.

Mugabe sick

While the majority of facebook updates this week have been about Easter eggs, my news feed has been dominated by this. Mugabe (president of my home country) is apparently very sick and may die. For those of us who are Zimbabwean this is big news, Mugabe has brought so much pain and suffering to the country and for many his death would be a relief, maybe even a joy. I’m not going to celebrate if he dies because the man who would take over rivals Mugabe for his evilness. Also I do not think we should celebrate the death someone who is evil. What does it solve? Nothing.

Mr Apple and I are proud owners of Rialto student cards, which entitles us to $10 movies all week. Awesome. I’ve been excited about ‘The Hunger Games’ release since December (when I demolished all 3 books one after the other – great Christmas present mama bear) and Mr Apple has been looking forward to it since February after he read the book, I had been telling him that I thought he would enjoy it and I think he was presently surprised. So last night being our anniversary (cute) we decided to go on a wee date to watch ‘The Hunger Games’. I was pleasantly surprised. I have learnt to go into movie adaptations with low expectations because so often I am disappointed (My Sisters Keeper?!) so it was nice to be proven wrong for one.

I truly think the movie did the book justice, and although there were some parts of the book missing, for the whole it was really good. If you haven’t read the book I strongly admit you read it. Unlike the ‘Twilight’ series you probably won’t be ashamed to say you read it (Twilight is my guilty-not so secret-pleasure) and I enjoyed it because it dealt with some pretty interesting issues. I don’t want to give away too much obviously but I am definitely a fan of Ms Suzanne Collins (though she’s no J.K.Rowling)

 

Hunger Games

via google images

On another note…

…I am totally guilty of this. Sometimes when I’m reading my Kindle I sniff it and then get sad because it doesn’t smell as nice as a book. Weird I know.

 

 

Dad

For me this is an emotional year. I graduate in December and I’m planning my wedding which will happen in February. It has also been 15 years since I lost my Dad on Wednesday. I have now lived over half my life without him and I still miss him so much. Even though he has not been here to see me grow up I think (and hope) that I have so much of him in me, I have his eyes, his taste in music, his fierce temper and loyalty, his obsession with things being ordered. I don’t think, that for those who lose a parent, we ever truly stop grieving. Certainly there are the days that we are happy and get on with our lives, but there are the days, when life events happen that you grieve for the loss, you simply just miss them. I think as humans we can not fully come to grips with the permanence of death, we can’t fully wrap our heads around it. Sometimes I just want my Dad here so I can ask “What do you think”. Although I have to put a side note here and say that my Mum has done an amazing job as a single parent and I am in awe of what she has achieved, she took us out of a 3rd world country and built an incredible life for us and never complained.

On Wednesday I know I will cry. It is what makes me who I am, I will never stop missing him and I wish that I didn’t get just 10 years with him.

I am lucky though, he was a great man and still today people who were his friends, workmates and even just acquaintances will tell me that. It makes me proud and I love hearing it, it helps me feel that little bit closer to him. I love him with all my heart and I cherish the memories that we have together, like the time he wanted to make me pancakes and burnt them so much they were inedible (the man was an amazing engineer but cooking was not his forte) or the way that his Scottish accent rubbed off on me when I was 2 and when people asked me what I was I would reply “I’m a wee girrrl” in Scottish brogue.

It doesn’t matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was.
– Anne Sexton
 
Dad and baby me

Dad and me as a baby

 
 
 
Maya Angelou – When Great Trees Fall
When great trees fall,
rocks on distant hills shudder,
lions hunker down
in tall grasses,
and even elephants
lumber after safety.When great trees fall
in forests,
small things recoil into silence,
their senses
eroded beyond fear.When great souls die,
the air around us becomes
light, rare, sterile.
We breathe, briefly.
Our eyes, briefly,
see with
a hurtful clarity.
Our memory, suddenly sharpened,
examines,
gnaws on kind words
unsaid,
promised walks
never taken.Great souls die and
our reality, bound to
them, takes leave of us.
Our souls,
dependent upon their
nurture,
now shrink, wizened.
Our minds, formed
and informed by their
radiance,
fall away.
We are not so much maddened
as reduced to the unutterable ignorance
of dark, cold
caves.
And when great souls die,
after a period peace blooms,
slowly and always
irregularly. Spaces fill
with a kind of
soothing electric vibration.
Our senses, restored, never
to be the same, whisper to us.
They existed. They existed.
We can be. Be and be
better. For they existed.